Suffering

Below is a list of exercises that relate to suffering, physical, emotional, situational and/or spiritual. These exercises are scaffolded on each other, so it may help to do them in order.

Day 1

I consider the following gospel passages: the two blind men (Matthew 9:27-31), the possessed man and the swine (Matthew 8:28-34), the ten lepers (Luke 17:11-19), and the hemorrhaging woman (Luke 8:43-48). What emotions do each of these healings invoke in me? Who do I feel the greatest connection to? Do I see myself in any of these characters? Do any of these people cause me uncomfortable or negative feelings?

Day 2

I think of suffering I’ve endured in the past— is it connected to now? How did it prepare me for this situation? In hindsight, where was God in this difficulty? What graces or blessings did you receive from it?

Day 3

I revisit Elisabeth Kubler Ross’ five elements of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. I meditate on my current suffering using this framework. What might of each of these stages look like, if an outsider observed me at this time?

Day 4

Poetry as Prayer, by Murray Bodo, begins with the statement that authentic prayer (and poetry) involves tension. With that framework, I reflect on the internal and external tension or conflict this suffering is causing me.

Day 5

Laments are found in many religious and secular traditions, often as poetry. Biblical laments follow a pattern: An address to God; a complaint; a petition for relief, a vow, and an expression of thanksgiving. I write a lament focused on my current suffering.

Day 6

Often God offers consolations in the midst of suffering, but we don’t always explore them fully, because we are preoccupied with our suffering. I pay attention to the consolations God has given me during this time of difficulty; the connection may be obvious, or subtle, but also explore to relationship between the two.

Day 7

Celtic spirituality includes the idea of “befriending.” I make a representation, through art mediums such as painting or sculpting of my suffering or the source of my struggles. I become friends with it, talking to it about the past, present or future in terms of its effect on my life. I share with it the difficulties and gifts, and offer a prayer of petition or thanksgiving. Following this contemplative exercise, I write about the experience in my journal.

Day 8

I read, meditate and respond to the following quotes about suffering.

“If you really want to love Jesus, first learn to suffer, because suffering teaches you to love.” –St. Gemma Galgani

“As iron is fashioned by fire and on the anvil, so in the fire of suffering and under the weight of trials, our souls receive that form which our Lord desires them to have.” –St. Madeline Sophie Barat

“If God gives you an abundant harvest of trials, it is a sign of great holiness which He desires you to attain. Do you want to become a great saint? Ask God to send you many sufferings. The flame of Divine Love never rises higher than when fed with the wood of the Cross, which the infinite charity of the Savior used to finish His sacrifice. All the pleasures of the world are nothing compared with the sweetness found in the gall and vinegar offered to Jesus Christ. That is, hard and painful things endured for Jesus Christ and with Jesus Christ.” –Saint Ignatius of Loyola

“When it is all over you will not regret having suffered; rather you will regret having suffered so little, and suffered that little so badly.” –St. Sebastian Valfre

Day 9

I imagine One of the Trinity, Mary or someone in the Communion of Saints, (living or deceased) is giving me a gift to encourage me; I notice all the little details … the smells, my skin, gestures. Following my experience, I write about it, pausing to return to the scene internally so to sharpen my understanding and observation.

Day 11

“Let us look through the front window, not the rear view mirror.” The rear view mirror makes that which is behind us seem bigger than it is. I write about this quote and concept, discussing its truth, or inaccuracy in terms of my own life, memories and difficulties.